


Hurt Your Feelings

by JotunPrincess



Series: At Our Age Shame Doesn't Exist [20]
Category: The Old Guard (Movie 2020)
Genre: Crack, Humor, Sexual Humor, Team as Family, he asked for it, roasted
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-11-20
Updated: 2020-11-20
Packaged: 2021-03-09 19:28:06
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 247
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27641411
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/JotunPrincess/pseuds/JotunPrincess
Summary: If you're dumb enough to use bad pick up lines then you've consented to the verbal roasting that follows.
Series: At Our Age Shame Doesn't Exist [20]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1910716
Comments: 3
Kudos: 65





	Hurt Your Feelings

The hand at the small of her back caused the Scythian to frown as she turned her head to take in the sight of the man looking to gain her attention. He smiled, "Hey baby, what that mouth do?"

"Hurt your fucking feelings."

He looked stunned for a moment and didn't move. Behind him, both Joe and Nicky took an interest in what was going on. 

"Whoa, whoa, come on now, no need to be like that." The guy tried. 

"Fuck off,"

He tried it again, "Oh come on, don't play hard to get. You know you'd look better if you smiled,"

"And you would look better without skin. I will carve your ass up like a Thanksgiving turkey if you don't get out of my face. Why the fuck do you think I would go home with you anyway? Looks like you hit every branch of the ugly tree on the way down. I dildos taller than you, your breath fucking stinks and you smell like the wrong end of a horse. Seriously get the fuck out of my face, get your hand off of me."

Joe was trying not to laugh as Nick rubbed his back to soothe him.

The man scurried away quickly. 

Nile coming up with her phone in hand as she saved the video of Andy's roasting. "I think you made him cry,"

"Andy has that effect on people, especially when they open with less than savory pick up lines," Nicky explained.

**Author's Note:**

> Andy doesn't do polite.


End file.
